pardon me while i burst

i have to get something out. anything. i just feel like i'm going to burst.

although that past few days have seemed "busy," it seems as if i'm doing things and keeping busy, but my body is just going through the motions, never really occupying enough of my attention to get the real shit that has been on my mind, off of my mind. 

i hate how i feel, no wait, have been feeling [for quite some time] like i have a million things to say. i hate even more that it's gone this long without an opportunity to say anything due to the efforts made, or rather lack thereof.

i hate how my mind wanders. i hate even more how it still wonders.

when will you stop "running from shit?" when will you realize that i'm still right in front of your face. waiting. patiently.

the get up kids still said it best--"you're barely missing me, i'm missing you."